Mama Drama

It’s 6:00 and the African Children’s Choir is scheduled to start performing in an hour.  We have waited for this choir to come for a month.  We have given money from our own change jar.  We have talked about it in school, at home, and around the community.  We were so excited to be able to have this opportunity in our small school and experience some culture.  Yet, here we are, not going.

I know that some may find this a little ridiculous, and I myself have wrestled with it the past hour.  It’s 7:30 now, and the little African Children are probably singing with all their hearts, dancing and smiling for the people of our little community.  The lead teacher may be getting ready to speak to everyone about the conditions from which these orphan children came.  He may be telling the audience about the goals that they have, their routines, and how their “Aunties” and “Uncles” care for them as they travel around our great nation, singing and dancing and telling their stories.

My own children are upstairs in their beds.  Because they have had a not so great night.  While I sit here, pushing through, thinking about the weight of the decision that I’ve made.  I told them several times to stop behaving inappropriately.  I told them to get along.  I told them that they were going to be staying home if they could not act right.  And I told them that they would miss this opportunity.  Still, for an hour, they chose to do what they wanted.

Love and Logic works.  Follow Through works.  Consequences work.  It all works if you make it work.  It just sometimes sucks.  Parenting isn’t easy.  Figuring out what to do when the kids don’t follow your plan isn’t always easy.  Being creative in the heat of the moment is definitely not easy.  Planning for every single possibility is impossible.

Both kids had a great day at school and daycare.  Both were very good listeners and doing just fine when we left.  But as soon as we were locked inside our tin can van, they decided to tickle, pick, poke, “potty talk”, and tell inappropriate jokes… they continued on into town, while we ran our ONE errand, and on the way home.  By the time I unlocked the door to let them in the house, I was ready to burst.  But I just shook my head and told them how unfortunate it was that they would miss this opportunity.

They whined and pleaded, but the chance to do the right thing had long passed.  We were home.  They had once again drained my energy.  They had decided to do what they wanted to do the entire time we were out, and they showed me that they are not ready to behave themselves through an hour long program in public.  Since my energy had been drained, there was no freaking way I was going to take them both into a gymnasium packed with 200 or more people, and try to make them obey me.  Not a chance that would be happening.  Add to that the bonus factor that my husband, who was not supposed to work tonight was working late again, so that would make me have to do the “parenting two crazy kids” thing solo, and yeah, that’s not gonna happen.

So, the sad thing is that I missed out on a great concert.  My kids missed out on a great concert and the chance to see other kids doing something they love for a good cause, with joy in their hearts.  We all missed the opportunity to do something together as a family, something that expands our horizons, challenges us to be better people and gives us a shared, cultural experience. That’s sad.

The important thing is that I kept my word and followed through.

And while follow through is important, it sometimes just sucks.