Not Me! Monday

Um… first of all, i wouldn’t walk by my computer like five hundred times today, yesterday, thinking, “i’ve gotta post something”, then get frustrated because i shouldn’t say what i want to say have writer’s block, so i can’t “say” anything. i THEN didn’t start reading MckMama’s blog like five minutes ago, PANIC and think i missed Not Me! Monday! No i didn’t!

i didn’t therefore title my post, “Not Me! Tuesday?” then look down at my clock and realize that it is indeed JUST becoming Monday. i didn’t then delete the “Tuesday” part, and put in “Monday”. No, because i’m not mistaken about what day it is!

i did not eat Rice Krispies with a ton of sugar and Popcorn for supper. No, because i love to eat venison, and i hate sweets and salty foods!

i didn’t have a headache today and i certainly did not try to figure out a way to fit all of A1’s toys in my bed, pre-make bottles and bring in burp rags and bibs so that she could lay in bed with me all day. Then, when i didn’t realize that this plan would be futile, i didn’t just ditch the whole thing, pack us both up and fall asleep in the recliner all the lazy day. No, that would not be me, because i didn’t have a headache today.

i also didn’t trip four times over the same sewage cap in a tavern we went to sing Karaoke in on New Year’s Eve. Because i didn’t go to a tavern, and if i would have gone; i knew the stinking cap was there. i would have seen it. i would not trip over it.

My child didn’t spit up her formula on the shirt i was wearing to dinner New Year’s Eve. No, and if she did, i most definitely wouldn’t have worn it to above mentioned tavern to sing Karaoke. No, i would have gone home and changed, because it just isn’t right to wear puke BEFORE you go to a tavern!

i did not wear two layers of clothing and a stocking cap inside my home today because i am hormonal. i also did not request that we turn the furnace up to 72 yesterday because i wasn’t hormonal then either.

i sure didn’t stick my hand in a dirty diaper because i am retentive about wrapping the diaper up inside itself before putting it in the diaper champ. no, i didn’t do that, so it wasn’t my hand that smelled like baby food poo for hours after that, even though i washed. Which i would have, if that would have been me. But it wasn’t. No. Not me!

Now, if it is still Monday where you are (apparently everywhere but on my planet), you can try your hand at Not Me! Monday. To see how it’s done, or to just read more (hey, it’s free therapy), visit MckMama’s Page. Until next week, please remember: If it wasn’t logical, perfect or sensible in any way, it was NOT ME!