This has been my mantra since Sunday morning. Literally, since the moment i walked BACK into the emergency room to have my gallbladder reevaluated, i have cried out, moaned, begged, whispered, asked through tears, pleaded on my knees, screamed under my breath, and just outright demanded, “Help Me, Please!!!”
Surgery was Tuesday morning, and although they were trying (and i was praying) for an outpatient type, there was too much scar tissue and too much infection to retrieve, so, i got my second major surgery in three and a half months! Joy! i don’t really remember waking up, or the recovery room. i do remember a small “closet” that was dimly lit and a male nurse talking to me as i moaned my lovely mantra, “Help Me Please”… i remember being wheeled back into my room and seeing my mother’s face above me, then Beef’s; then i remember the staff telling me they were going to get me back into my bed. After that, i don’t remember much for a while. Seriously? The whole scene was like flashes of these moments, and then fade to black, then more flashes of consciousness, then more black. Oh but then i had to pee! Come on people… you didn’t think i was just going to snap back to reality with some frufru flowery moment, where Beef is leaning over me telling me how precious i am, and how thankful he is that i made it through the surgery alright – do you? You haven’t been reading long enough then… so after trying to use a bedpan to no avail (i can’t pee horizontal) i was offered a commode, and while in my normal everyday life, i might find such an offer offensive, even grossly “germarific”, and completely unnecessary (i had my gallbladder removed, not my legs!) at this moment, a commode sounded like an eight karat diamond tiara complete with roses and “potty queen” sash, and after using said commode, i was feeling like i should have been awarded those glamorous consolations!
So, in my newly designed dual restroom suite, with my exhausted husband now crashed on the window seat/bed and my laptop on my handy dandy little rolling bed table cart thingy, i believe i can go on. Although, i am fully aware that strangers have invaded my body, removed parts and left a road map of the entire procedure. i am acutely aware that when the insane amount of IV drugs they gave me wears off, i will be in additional “discomfort”, and i can’t deny that this entire experience has been one that i will NEVER forget, i must also add that i am still GRATEFUL! And so you noticed that i was able to post my Thankful Thursday post.
i started this blog shortly after that post, but was released from the hospital, and haven’t been able to get it together until now. In fact, I’m not sure it’s together, but at least i am able to do a few “B’s”… breathe, burp, bend, and blow (my nose) – although it is still a little painful, it gets better every hour. i must go and get more rest, because i want to be able to do the most important thing in my day – pick up my beautiful daughter and carry her. I’m not allowed yet, but if i keep being “good”, maybe I’ll heal extra fast, and i can do it tomorrow!
Thank you for all of your well wishes, emails, cards and visits to the hospital. It was a weird experience, being in the hospital and actually having family stop by… very nice, very much appreciated, but like i told my father in law – i can’t believe I’m here! i seriously still have a hard time remembering that we live here… we can borrow anything from anyone, and return it next week, our parents and siblings will rush right over to help with whatever we need. After so many years of figuring out how to do it on our own, it was so bizarre to remember that we don’t have to anymore. Thanks again to EVERYONE who helped/visited/thought/prayed with ANYTHING… no deed was too small to be appreciated or recognized… even changing the bag in the diaper champ!
Oh love, my heart overflows!
So, in my newly designed dual restroom suite, with my exhausted husband now crashed on the window seat/bed and my laptop on my handy dandy little rolling bed table cart thingy, i believe i can go on. Although, i am fully aware that strangers have invaded my body, removed parts and left a road map of the entire procedure. i am acutely aware that when the insane amount of IV drugs they gave me wears off, i will be in additional “discomfort”, and i can’t deny that this entire experience has been one that i will NEVER forget, i must also add that i am still GRATEFUL! And so you noticed that i was able to post my Thankful Thursday post.
i started this blog shortly after that post, but was released from the hospital, and haven’t been able to get it together until now. In fact, I’m not sure it’s together, but at least i am able to do a few “B’s”… breathe, burp, bend, and blow (my nose) – although it is still a little painful, it gets better every hour. i must go and get more rest, because i want to be able to do the most important thing in my day – pick up my beautiful daughter and carry her. I’m not allowed yet, but if i keep being “good”, maybe I’ll heal extra fast, and i can do it tomorrow!
Thank you for all of your well wishes, emails, cards and visits to the hospital. It was a weird experience, being in the hospital and actually having family stop by… very nice, very much appreciated, but like i told my father in law – i can’t believe I’m here! i seriously still have a hard time remembering that we live here… we can borrow anything from anyone, and return it next week, our parents and siblings will rush right over to help with whatever we need. After so many years of figuring out how to do it on our own, it was so bizarre to remember that we don’t have to anymore. Thanks again to EVERYONE who helped/visited/thought/prayed with ANYTHING… no deed was too small to be appreciated or recognized… even changing the bag in the diaper champ!
Oh love, my heart overflows!
© amysara and TheRFarm.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to amysara and TheRFarm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to amysara and TheRFarm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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