As if things weren’t weird and stressful enough in my life, we’ve now been given a new challenge… we’re moving.
Now, don’t worry, we’re not going anywhere until our daughter arrives, but we’ll be moving shortly thereafter. So, that was the news on Friday… moving again. This time it will be a “permanent” move… We’re going to go back home to Iowa and be with our family. At first, the thought was great, it was something we’d been thinking about, even praying about, so that our little princess could be raised with her cousins and grandparents. We want a simple life for her, like we had, not filled with malls and traffic, but quiet country living. However, it became frightening for me when i told my friends and boss. Remember, i am a workaholic, and my work is my safe place. Even though i was teetering back and forth with work or no work after she is born, the mere thought of not having my work to go to was not really in my mind. Saying the words out loud to someone not invested in A1 or Beef and i was also sobering… not that my boss isn’t invested in me, but family is different… they need you (at least they say they do)… i guess i just don’t feel like i make that big of a difference in anyone’s life as far as friends and co-workers go… sure, i show up every day, i pray for them, i talk to them, i care about them, but they all have families too… they have people they can go to and count on other than me. So i really didn’t expect the feelings i would have when i told people other than blood relatives. i suddenly felt lost, like my world was starting to spin. Who would i talk to? Who will i share my everyday concerns with? Where will i go when i need advice from people i respect? There are a handful of people here that are not related to me, whose opinion and wisdom i truly value. i know i can always call them, and email them, but it’s not the same. The hugs are gone, seeing them face to face, knowing if they are faking it when i ask if they are alright… i don’t like that. How will i share the joys and concerns that they have if i am so far away? We’ll miss birthdays and graduations and weddings and babies… daily cares and funnies… they aren’t the same long-distance. i don’t really know how i feel about moving. It’s almost too scary to fully digest right now. After all, there’s so much to think about. So many details to work out. So much to worry about… and i will have a little one soon… that only adds to it!
© amysara and TheRFarm.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to amysara and TheRFarm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to amysara and TheRFarm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Momma Rich's 